Perfectingmyinnereeyore

I first learned what long distance friendship was when I was just 11 years old, and a lot of people ask me what its like. It’s a daily reminder that the world is bigger than your bubble. It’s a reminder that just because you don’t see someone everyday, or once a week, or even once every 6 months, it doesn’t make them less of a friend. You learn to cherish the time you have together to the fullest. You say “I miss you” more than you ever imagined you’d say in a lifetime in a single phone call. You learn patience. And I’d be lying if I said it was easy. There are times where you aren’t able to talk to each other for weeks. Where you have no clue what’s happening in the others life. But there are also the times where the phone calls and face times go on for hours on end. The times where you cant get off the phone, when you don’t want to say goodbye. The times when something horrible happens and you know they’ll be there for you. The laughs are truer, the friendships are deeper, the dista...

   Texas is the only place I've ever lived. When my family moved to Dallas, it was hard. I was 5 hours away from my childhood home and all my childhood friends. But moving to Tennessee feels like moving across the world. I'm having to pick up everything and move to a completely new place with new people so very far from everything I've ever known. And to make it better, moving means saying goodbye. And I hate goodbyes.    I become close to people very quick. Its just who I am. And becoming close to people quickly means I've had lots of time to get to know each other which means saying goodbyes kinda sucks..    In this day and age all we have to do is shoot out a text or post a picture on Instagram and you are instantly connected to pretty much any and everyone in the world. So why is saying goodbye so hard? Why do I feel sick to my stomach seeing people for the last time?     For me, I'm afraid I'm gonna lose people. That people who...

    We are often tempted to portray a "edited" version of ourselves on social media. Even when we post "reality" pictures on our Instagram or Facebook we still tend to edit it. Reading and re-reading what we say.      Social media makes it easy to portray a perfect life. It is so easy to post something, leaving out the hard stuff. It also makes it easy to become jealous because it seems like everyone else's life is so perfect and no one else has the same problems as you.     The idea of connecting over social media isn't new, it's the concept of  friendship that has changed. Friends used to be the people you saw every week at church or at school but more and more often, friends are becoming the people we talk to over that internet or that one kid that starts liking your pictures. Friends are now becoming people we have never meet.      Social media is taking over our lives and we aren't stoping it. We aren't...

They were always so far away.    So far in fact that while devastating and scary they never affected me.  But then, it happened.  One hit a little to close to home.    After years of hearing on the news about a shooting over in that country or that state way over there it was here. My home the city close to where I lived. It was terrifying.  I truly wonder how many people are becoming numb to the violence around us. How many people are like "oh it's happening again..." When I was younger, this was not the world I imagined growing up in.     Even though my fairy tale world was forever crushed around age 9 but I have to keep asking myself why?  What good is coming from this?  I've found myself digging deeper into Gods word because we never know what's gonna happen next.  God has a plan for it all.  But even knowing that sometimes does nothing. 

If you've ever moved you know how hard it can be. For me, I had only heard stories about moving, and experienced lots of my friends moving away. But not me. I'd lived in the same town for 13 1/2 years. The same house for 9 years. I had my circle of friends, an amazing theater group. Life was good. When I heard all those moving stories my friends told, they sounded amazing. The friends they made, the adventures they'd had, part of me wanted to move. Rarely did the stories tell of pain.  About 9 months ago my dad got a new job. In a new town. The new job was 5 hours away from my childhood life. From all I had ever known. Moving wasn't like I was expected. Every time I remember how I thought moving would go I think of some song lyrics by Moriah Peters.  "You never told me that this would be easy, but I never knew that it would be this hard..."  Now of course I know Moriah wasn't talking about moving when she wrote Brave, but that line really se...

" F or I know the plans I have for you, declares the  Lord ,"-  Jeremiah 29:11     I find myself worrying more about the "what ifs" in life than the "what dids". What if I had sung when I was asked instead of making excuses? What if I had spent more time ministering to that kid instead of walking off to talk to my friend? Or What if I had talked to that new kid at church? These questions nag and pull at me all the time! I find myself missing out on the things in life because I am caught up in yesterdays worry's. Some of the worst what ifs in life that i have had to face were: * What if I was her? she is so beautiful! * What if I was her? she is so talented! * What if I was her? Her siblings are so kind to her! Wishing you were someone else is never good! for The bible says: " I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.  Wonderful are your works;  my soul knows it very well." -  Psalm 139:14   ...