Perfectingmyinnereeyore

They were always so far away.    So far in fact that while devastating and scary they never affected me.  But then, it happened.  One hit a little to close to home.    After years of hearing on the news about a shooting over in that country or that state way over there it was here. My home the city close to where I lived. It was terrifying.  I truly wonder how many people are becoming numb to the violence around us. How many people are like "oh it's happening again..." When I was younger, this was not the world I imagined growing up in.     Even though my fairy tale world was forever crushed around age 9 but I have to keep asking myself why?  What good is coming from this?  I've found myself digging deeper into Gods word because we never know what's gonna happen next.  God has a plan for it all.  But even knowing that sometimes does nothing. 

If you've ever moved you know how hard it can be. For me, I had only heard stories about moving, and experienced lots of my friends moving away. But not me. I'd lived in the same town for 13 1/2 years. The same house for 9 years. I had my circle of friends, an amazing theater group. Life was good. When I heard all those moving stories my friends told, they sounded amazing. The friends they made, the adventures they'd had, part of me wanted to move. Rarely did the stories tell of pain.  About 9 months ago my dad got a new job. In a new town. The new job was 5 hours away from my childhood life. From all I had ever known. Moving wasn't like I was expected. Every time I remember how I thought moving would go I think of some song lyrics by Moriah Peters.  "You never told me that this would be easy, but I never knew that it would be this hard..."  Now of course I know Moriah wasn't talking about moving when she wrote Brave, but that line really se...

" F or I know the plans I have for you, declares the  Lord ,"-  Jeremiah 29:11     I find myself worrying more about the "what ifs" in life than the "what dids". What if I had sung when I was asked instead of making excuses? What if I had spent more time ministering to that kid instead of walking off to talk to my friend? Or What if I had talked to that new kid at church? These questions nag and pull at me all the time! I find myself missing out on the things in life because I am caught up in yesterdays worry's. Some of the worst what ifs in life that i have had to face were: * What if I was her? she is so beautiful! * What if I was her? she is so talented! * What if I was her? Her siblings are so kind to her! Wishing you were someone else is never good! for The bible says: " I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.  Wonderful are your works;  my soul knows it very well." -  Psalm 139:14   ...

This blog is meant to be inspirational, but is also just a place where I can write my thoughts or jot things that I am going through down. Hence the name "Perfecting My Inner Eeyore." This blog began as a place to record my journey through depression and how I am learning and growing more like Christ.